Isaiah 53:4 says, 4 "Surely He took up our pain and bore our suffering, yet we considered Him punished by God, stricken by Him, and afflicted." As I was reading this verse tonight I was reminded of how Jesus was made human by God to bare our pain; our sins. God sacrificed His own Son so that we would one day live sorrow and pain free. If anyone doubts that there is such a Great Being; listen to my testimony. As you know on June 20, 2015 at around 2:30 pm I received the most difficult call I, as a mother, ever hope to receive again. I was told my child was in a bad accident and to meet the helicopter at Memorial Hospital in Savannah. JD's daddy and I drove as quickly as we could to get to our son. During the trip I had the worst pain in my knees. The pain was so drastic that I remember telling David that I may not be able to walk to the hospital. The pain was a not like any other I had before! My knees ached and burned, and they did this all the way to Savannah. When David and I pulled into the parking lot, my pain ceased. It did not completely go away, but it lessened. I was able to walk to get to my child. We were directed to a waiting area and told they would give us news as soon as they could, but JD's injuries were bad. My knees began to ache again; not as severe; but it was an obvious ache that I had attributed to stress. When we were told of JD's death my knees hurt no more, only my heart now was hurting. It was broken and still is. However, it wasn't until after we received some medical bills that I was reminded of how incredible our God is! One of the procedures that the emergency workers performed on JD is called an Intraosseous Insertion. This procedure provides a route for administering fluid, blood, and medication. What makes this verse so real and believable to me about Jesus taking our pain and suffering is where the workers placed JD's insertion. The insertion was in his KNEE! Only God could create human beings that could take pain and suffering for others. I believe JD's pain was transferred to me; as ours was transferred to Jesus. I, as I am sure most of you would; take the pain for the people we love. How can we deny God's love for us if He allowed His only Son to take our pain? We can't! Again as I close I want to thank you God for giving our family JD for 18 wonderful years. Thank you for saving him, and thank you for sending Your Son to die for all of our sins so that we may live with you and our loved ones again one day. And as for you J.d. Paul you make me prouder everyday to be your mama. You, my son, are still working for Your Heavenly Father. People are moving and thinking because of you. I am so happy God chose me to be your mama. I love you to the moon!
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Matthew 24: 42-43 says, "Therefore be on the alert, for you do not know which day your Lord is coming. "But be sure of this, that if the head of the house had known at what time of the night the thief was coming, he would have been on the alert and would not have allowed his house to be broken into." In this picture, JD and the runner were on "alert". To be on alert means also that you have to prepare; to be ready. They were both were "prepared" for the pick-off or the stolen base. Our lives should be the same way. We know not the hour our Lord will return, but we can know without a doubt He is coming! To me that excites me to know that I will see Him and all those who have gone before me again; and you all know the first one I will run to; my sweet angel boy. I had a bad day yesterday, and of course God sent me several "angels" to remind me that we are "preparing" for the day that we will be with our Father. To do that we have to dig deeper into His word and listen for what He is telling us to do. Now, that's not always easy, but He never said it would be. When I woke up this morning I felt like I was that mother again who sent her children off to different places and I "prepared" for their return by praying for them to be safe, making their favorite meal or bringing them a little surprise. I was delighted in the fact that I can still be that mother for JD. I can be on "alert", and I can do as God is asking me to do to be "prepared" for His return. I have a very special ministry that I feel God has placed on my heart. I am asking that you say a prayer that God will "prepare" me for this ministry so that I can make Him proud. As the verse says, "you do not know which day your Lord is coming", and I want to be able to tell Him that I was "prepared for Him just as I did my beautiful children's return while they were away from me. "Lord prepare me", I want to see You and live with You; and You know I want to see this first baseman in this picture. Dear God, Thank You for "preparing" him, and thank you for what I know is going to be a good day of me being "prepared" and on "alert" while waiting to have my whole family together again. And as always I will praise and thank You for sending this precious gift my way to bring me closer to You. J.d. Paul I am "alert". I am "preparing". I will see you again soon baby. I love you to the moon!
Now I lay me down to rest
Thank you Lord for the best I will praise You everyday For these blessings you sent my way Chrisine, yesterday morning, I heard the song "I Can Only Imagine" on the radio. It's one of my favorite songs, and I immediately thought of JD and all that he must doing in Heaven worshiping God. It brought a smile to my face, and I hope it does to you, too.
1 John 3:1 says, "See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know Him." Last night David and I had the honor to go to the home of Jiggs and Peggy Harper Rigginsto give a devotion to some of the kids representing their school on Student Council. The Executive Board of our High School's Student Council had spent all day learning leadership skills. At the very end of the day's activities the students were asked to give something that meant a lot to them to another member. I must admit even as I was helping Hannah get hers ready, we didn't understand the task completely. We chose her Bible and bookmark that she had with her brother's obituary printed on it, because it is through those words that she is finding comfort in JD's death. As we were sitting there and I watched these children talk about their item with heartfelt emotions; some with tears falling down their faces; I realized they wanted them back. It was theirs, and who could blame them? My devotion quickly started changing in my head as I thought of the sacrifice God gave. He watched His only Son die on the cross for our sins, so that we may live with Him where there will be no more sorrow, no more tears and no more burdens. Then, of course, my mind went to my gift that I had to give away, my JD. "I can't get him back", I said to these children. I began feeling like the children were "caught between two stools." They knew the right thing to do would be to give the gift away, but it was hard to part with it. I was torn about having to give up my gift even though I know that it is what had to be done. And then it hit me "like a ton of bricks". What an extraordinary love must our Father have for us to "lavish" us with such love and grace, even when we are most selfish, so that we could be called His children? God calls us, as Christians, to be different and not to conform to this world; and to give up our worldly lives to glorify His name. As Hannah's parent sitting there, it broke my heart! These are good kids but they are caught up in a world where the majority of it does not know God. They are torn and confused. I saw them battling with "enemies" and "foes" in their lives, because they are afraid to be different. They live in a selfish world that does not "lavish" people with grace and love. They live in this place because of exactly what God's word says, the world does not know Him. If our world knew God, our kids would have been more willing to share of themselves without selfishness or embarrassment being a problem. We have got to be more like our Father. We have got to give as He gives to us. We have got to show our children God. We have got to begin today and be a sanctuary for our Lord in hopes that the world will know Him. He gave the ultimate gift for us. Can't we give of ourselves for Him? If not for us but for our children, because we all know that they are our greatest gift; just as Jesus was His. Don't we want to know that our children will be resting in the arms of our sweet Savior one day? It sure has given our family peace knowing that JD is doing just that. He is resting in His arms, and because we believe God's word; we will be resting with our Comforter and our JD again. I challenge myself and you to "lavish" someone with love and grace today, just as our Father has done for us.
Deuteronomy 16:17 says, "Every man shall give as he is able, according to the blessing of the LORD thy God which he hath given thee." If you are in Jesup today from 1-7, please go give blood. The blood drive is at Calvary Baptist Church. Again, thank you J.d. Paul and my Savior for making me a better person.
I have heard from people and read about the stages of grief, but I will say that when trying to find comfort from our loss of JD I want to dig deeper into God's word. I was doing my journal on Wednesday night and the verse Psalm 119:44 were the words written on my page. See I'm supposed to read the verse and then respond with my feelings to the verse. The verse says, " The righteousness of thy testimonies is everlasting; give me understanding, and I shall live." Like usual I have to look up how I should interpret some verses. As you all know, some are not so easy to understand. Well to me this was one of them. I found where this verse had been translated. The translation was very clear when I read it, "The way You tell me to live is always right; help me understand it, so I can live to the fullest." At this point it was late, and I had had me a full day of grieving. My response was, " You told me on June 20th You were taking back my gift You had loaned me for 18 years. You told me that everything is done for Your glory. You also told me that You would take care of me. I believe that, as this verse says; or is translated to say; The way You tell me to live is always right; help me understand, so I can live to the fullest." Well, the more I wrote; the more I seemed to get upset. The words that I wrote after this bothered me a little, but I couldn't stop them from coming. They were, "You WILL bring me comfort and peace. You WILL bring me out of the darkness into Your light. I will praise You in this storm, but You WILL reunite me with my son again." If you notice my last words were out of frustration. I wanted God to know that I trusted Him and I expected Him to keep His promise. I felt horrible that I was speaking to my Father in this way. I quickly looked for another verse to explain my frustration. It was found in Psalm 13. I would love for you to read it. I feel like it would touch you more if you look it up for yourself. A little of the background is that David wrote this verse, because he was sad or upset that Saul was trying to kill him. After reading this verse, I was able to add my last thoughts, and they are; "Thank You for Your sacrifice that ensures that Christ died and rose again so that we could live with You and all other believers again. Thank you for using JD to touch so many lives. Please continue to use him in ways to glorify Your Kingdom. Help me to be more pleasing to You. I love you, God." God quickly turned my grief into a praising period with Him. I felt renewed in the fact that "I shall live", because that is what He promised me. And as I close this post I would also like to share what God sent me the very next day in the mail. I received a card and on the outside it said, "I am Your God, I WILL strengthen you, Yes, I WILL help you, I WILL uphold you... Isaiah 41:10. Thank you God for keeping Your promises and loving us unconditionally. Thank you for the journey we had with JD, but thank You for the one that is yet to come. David, Hannah and I will praise You in this storm! We all love you to the moon. J.d. Paul
"Read me a story
Tuck me in tight Say a sweet prayer And kiss me goodnight" Thank you, God, for sweet memories. I posted this 5 years ago when JD was at church camp. I'm so glad he had opportunities to experience moments with our Savior while he was living on earth, but can you imagine the experiences now? I will get to where you are, baby. I hope everyone reading this will too.
Tonight I wish upon a star and send a kiss to where you are; I’ll send a hug to tuck you in until we are together again. I love you JD! Many of you have prayed with me for this sweet family since June 20th when their son, JD Paul, died in a car accident. Every time I read his mother's thoughts and posts, I am just inspired. From such unimaginable pain to a heart of thanks, this family touched so many because of their faith. JD's death has brought revival in my small town and given Hope to the hopeless, Love to the unloved, and Peace to the weary. Relationships have been strengthened and lives changed.
I am so very thankful to know this family and to be able to hear of God's goodness even through heartache. Thank you, Chrisine Paul, for being so open and willing to share your heart with so many! |
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